No Offense

One day over the summer, Spencer sat down next to me and said, "no offense but your legs are fat." If that was not bad enough, he followed that lovely comment with, "no offense but your neck has a lot of wrinkles." I explained (or, attempted to explain) to Spencer that the fact that he prefaces a comment with "no offense" does not guarantee that the person he is criticizing will not feel bad or offended.

Fast forward three months, in the morning, before school. As the boys are walking out of the house, I asked them to wait so that I could check my hair. Spencer responded, "you look beautiful," slight pause, then "...sort of." Michael, who always wants to make sure that nobody feels bad, countered with, "you look more beautiful than a supermodel." Obviously Michael's comment was way over the top, but it was sweet of him and I appreciated it. If the conversation had ended there, I likely would have forgotten all about it, but it did not end there. Spencer reproached Michael with, "don't say that to Mom. That's not true."

He did not add "no offense."